The not-in-a-hurry edit · 15 picks
15 hiking T-shirts for people who ask “How much farther?”
For the scenic-route takers, the frequent-break crowd, and the friend who was promised a flat trail. Find the tee that sounds like you.
Someone always says it’s “just a little farther.” Somehow, that person is never the one at the back.
If your kind of hiking includes stopping for the view, laughing at the incline, and discussing lunch well before the summit, you’re in the right place. We pulled together 15 tees from our collection for exactly that sort of day.
Some get the laugh straight away. Some have a little joke in the fine print. Others let a very unhurried woodland creature do the talking.
Our edit is based on artwork, personality, and who each design suits. These are cotton graphic tees for casual wear and easygoing days outside.
01–03 / The first incline
For the “how much farther?” crowd.
You said yes to the hike. These three explain everything that happened next.
01 Bad Knees
For knees with a different itinerary
You love the view. Your knees would like a word about the way down. This is our first pick for a familiar trail complaint: a classic mountain graphic, followed by the much more honest “Just Bad Knees.”
Choose this for the clearest, quickest trail joke.
From $34.958 colors · S–3XL
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02 Instant Regret
For regretting the first 0.2 miles
The tiny mileage sign makes this one. Our little hiker is barely underway and already reconsidering. If “an easy walk” has ever turned into a discussion about who chose the route, you’ll understand the Instant Regret Hiking Club.
Choose this for the cartoon—and the suspiciously relatable sign.
From $34.958 colors · S–3XL
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03 Out Of Breath
For “I’ll catch up in a minute”
From a distance, it’s a handsome hiking-club tee. Up close, the fine print explains your whereabouts. The mountain-and-compass artwork makes this the understated option in our first three picks; the punchline arrives just a little later. Naturally.
Choose this if you want a traditional outdoor graphic with a joke tucked in.
“Great conversation starter as well!!”Lashara D. · Verified Out Of Breath buyer · Read review
From $34.955 colors · S–4XL
See colors & sizes04–06 / The slow lane
Happy at the back.
For hikers who have already decided that getting there eventually is quite enough.
04 Slow Hiking Society Snail
For finishing last, quite happily
“The Last One to the Top Wins.” Finally, some reasonable rules. A backpack-wearing snail and a patch of mushrooms make this the friendliest invitation in the list: come along, look around, take the time you need.
Our pick for the hiker who makes everyone feel welcome.
From $34.957 colors · S–3XL
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05 Slow Hiker
For setting expectations early
The turtle has packed a bag and tied a bandana. Preparation is excellent; urgency is absent. Big, simple lettering does the explaining before the group sets off, while the bright little trail scene keeps it cheerful.
The most direct “this is my pace” design of the three.
From $34.957 colors · S–3XL
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06 Not Lost Just Slow
For being late, but correctly located
Three finely drawn snails answer the group chat: “You’re Not Lost. You’re Slow.” We like the contrast between the delicate illustration and the blunt message. Navigation is fine. Arrival time is flexible.
Pick this for quieter colors and a drier sense of humor.
From $34.956 colors · S–3XL
See colors & sizes07–09 / The good-company edit
The friend you hike with matters.
A modest achievement, a Bigfoot sighting, and a small navigational error. Pick the one that sounds like your group.
07 World’s Okayest Hiker
For perfectly average ambitions
The sloth has a clipboard. The assessment is in: you’re doing okay. This is the tee for someone who enjoys showing up without turning a Saturday walk into a personal record. An outdoor title you don’t have to train for.
An easy gift idea for your proudly uncompetitive hiking friend.
From $34.958 colors · S–3XL
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08 Slow Squatch
For the group’s resident Bigfoot fan
Bigfoot is out for a wander, and he remembered a snack. The chunky lettering and bright retro colors give this one the loudest personality in the group. Choose it when you want a proper character graphic, not just a slogan.
The boldest, most colorful artwork in this trio.
From $34.958 colors · S–3XL
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09 Trail And Error
For the scenic wrong turn
A signpost, a mountain, and “mostly the second part.” This one rewards a closer look. The outdoor scene is easy to wear with everyday clothes; the small line below is for the friend who remembers that particular detour.
Choose this for a subtle joke about questionable route planning.
From $34.957 colors · S–3XL
See colors & sizes10–12 / The woodland edit
A little less slogan. A little more story.
Detailed creatures, mushroom patches, and a moonlit wander. Three picks for people who fall for the illustration first.
10 Snail Pace Patrol
For letting the artwork do the talking
A hedgehog rides a snail with the confidence of an explorer on a grand expedition. There’s no slogan to read. The detailed cream illustration on black carries the whole idea, making this our pick for someone who usually skips wordy tees.
The no-slogan option. Available in black.
From $34.95Black · S–3XL
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11 No Pace No Pressure
For leaving the stopwatch at home
A bird, a snail, bright orange mushrooms, and a very good policy. This is a playful woodland design about enjoying a slow walk, without making the joke about aching knees or running out of breath.
Choose this when going slowly is the plan, not the punchline.
From $34.957 colors · S–3XL
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12 Wander At Your Pace
For noticing what everyone else missed
A raccoon carries a lantern through a moonlit forest. The dark green scene and warm yellow details make this one feel like a tiny storybook. A lovely match for the person who always stops to look a little closer.
The most atmospheric woodland scene in this group.
From $34.957 colors · S–3XL
See colors & sizes13–15 / The after-hike edit
The best part might be the break.
For the hammock, the campsite, the coffee afterward—and the very sensible decision to stay a little longer.
13 Trail Nap Champion
For winning the rest stop
Some people train for the summit. This sloth has found a hammock. The big club-style lettering gives a very leisurely activity the recognition it deserves. If the best bit of a hike is the break, here’s your title.
The playful pick for campers and accomplished loungers.
From $34.958 colors · S–3XL
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14 Slow Is Enough
For a gentler trail motto
An owl, a crescent moon, a tent, and three words: “Slow Is Enough.” The fine linework feels lighter and quieter than the bolder club graphics. Pick this when you’d rather wear a small reminder than a big punchline.
The softest message in the roundup.
From $34.957 colors · S–3XL
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15 Made For Slower Things
For taking the feeling home
“Perhaps You Were Made for Slower Things.” A sloth hangs above the mountains, looking entirely at peace with that possibility. This is our final pick because it fits the coffee afterward, the quiet afternoon, and the day with absolutely nothing booked.
For the person whose slower pace extends beyond the trail.
From $34.957 colors · S–3XL
See colors & sizesBefore you pick your size
A good joke.
A fit you’ll love.
The design is the fun part. Here are the practical details before you choose a color and size.
How should I choose my size?
Lay a favorite tee flat and compare its width and length with the size guide on the product page. Choose the fit you like, and select your size before adding to cart.
Sizes and colors vary by design. Each link opens a selected color where available; see the product page for every option.
What if the size isn’t right?
Contact us within 30 days of your original purchase for a size replacement. If you don’t love your clothing, contact us within the same window for a refund.
No return required—donate the original or share it with a friend. Read the full policy ↗
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U.S. shipping is $4.95. Orders of $85 or more ship free. See shipping details ↗
Advertisement by Sloth Hiking Club. Lifestyle images are digitally created using our tee designs. Check product pages for current colors, sizes, pricing, and product images.